Me, calling to cancel my landline with AT&T.
Oscar: Hello, AT&T this is Oscar how may I be of service to you?
Me: Hello I’d like to cancel my landline.
Oscar: OK, I see the cancellation order has already gone through, may I ask why you want to leave?
Me: We’ve decided to just bundle all of our services together.
Oscar: May I ask who you are choosing now?
Oscar: Is there a reason you chose SureWest?
Me: The bundle option is more cost-effective. It’s nothing personal to AT&T.
Oscar: Did you research U-Verse? May I tell you about what we can provide?
Me: Oh, I researched it, I know we can get the fiber option, but the speeds are faster with SureWest and they can offer a better packaged deal. It’s really just the bottom dollar; you understand. I have no problems with AT&T.
Oscar: We can offer 24bit speeds with U-Verse.
Me: And that’s great, but we would prefer the faster speed with SureWest. It’s already installed so I don’t think it makes a lot of sense to try and re-think it. I feel comfortable with my research and decision.
Oscar: Do you have HD on your TV?
Me: (pause) Yes..
Oscar: Have you looked into our channel options with HD and premium channels? Do you watch HBO or do you watch a lot of sports?
Me: Yep and I looked into all the options I need at this time. It’s just a better deal for what we’re looking for right now.
Oscar: What about wireless, do you use AT&T for your cell phone use? I could offer you a free iPhone 4S with a contract that includes..
Me: Sir. I have already told you what I need at this time. I’ve told you that it’s nothing personal with AT&T. I’m not going to switch any services and I’m fully informed about what is the best fit at this time for my family. I understand this is part of your job and I promise I appreciate your effort, but I really need to just finalize this call.
Oscar: OK, well I show the phone number has been switched at this time so you should be set. A prorated billing statement will arrive in a couple weeks. Is there anything else I can discuss with you about our products or services?
Oscar: Alright, well then I hope you have a wonderful day; we appreciate your business and please remember not to text and drive!